What does the Speaker note about his "two" identities in the poem, The Fairy Reel?

The speaker examines a life lived with two identities: an ordinary, mundane existence lived out “in the world of men” (Line 4), and another that is “away with the fairies,” or caught up in a world of magic and imagination. Even as the speaker faced heartbreak and potential abuse in this world, they still long to return to it. Coming to the end of their life, the speaker wishes they had never ruptured themselves in half and instead lived a complete if un-extraordinary life like those around him.